


Swinging

by sweet_poeia



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), American Idol RPF, Kris Allen (Musician)
Genre: Community: kradamadness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-11
Updated: 2011-05-11
Packaged: 2017-10-19 06:11:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/197815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweet_poeia/pseuds/sweet_poeia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to "Wild Idol," in which Adam is a faux Tarzan and Kris is really kind of OK with that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Swinging

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Kradamadness Round 9: Movies.

“I guess the Tarzan jokes are inevitable.”

Kris is draped across Adam, who is lounging in a hammock, which is swinging high atop an umbrella tree in the Congo.

“Really?” Adam ponders this. “I don’t really see it.” He feeds Kris another chunk of mango.

“You don’t--what? Seriously?” Kris raises his head to look at Adam. Adam catches a drop of mango juice on Kris’s chin. “Wait, have you ever even seen Tarzan?”

Adam ruffles Kris’s hair affectionately. “Of course I have. I grew up in the real world, you know. Contrary to your ape-man fantasies.” Adam wiggles his eyebrows and trails his fingers down Kris’s back and under the top of his loincloth.

Kris purrs and rests his head back on Adam’s chest. “Not just _my_ fantasy,” he mutters under his breath.

“Hmm?”

“Nothing. So which one?”

“Which one what?”

“Which Tarzan?”

“Oh. Um. Greystoke. Christopher Lambert. No relation. I watched that video over and over when I was a kid. I still can’t figure out how Glenn Close stole Andie McDowell’s voice.”

“...What?”

“Andie McDowell played Jane. Except they decided they didn’t like her Southern accent, so they got Glenn Close to dub in her voice. You know, before she was Glenn Close.”

“No kidding.”

“Mmm hmm. Crazy. Nothing more irresistible than a Southern accent, if you ask me.”

“I never saw that one. I saw the Disney one, though.”

“Glenn Close was in that one, too. She voiced Tarzan’s gorilla mom.”

“Seriously, how do you know this stuff?”

Adam shrugs. “I know some things.”

“OK, then how can you not see that the comparisons are inevitable?”

“How so?”

“Well, you live in the jungle, with bonobos. In a treehouse. And then I come along, and you carry me off, and then I kind of...stay.”

“So, you’re thinking you’re Jane in this scenario.”

“Well, obviously.”

“Still don’t see it, sorry. Anyway, in the movies, don’t they take Tarzan back to civilization?”

Kris’s head pops up. “What? No! Tarzan and Jane stay in the jungle, and the gorilla troop accepts them, and Phil Collins sings “Two Worlds, One Family”!

“That’s Disney, baby.” Adam soothes Kris back down.

Kris is silent for a while, then, “So what happens? In civilization.”

“Oh, I don’t remember.”

“Yes you do! It’s bad, isn’t it?”

“It’s not a good fit, no.”

“Well, they’d be smarter just staying in Africa.” Kris snuggles in deep.

“Mmm. Yeah, about that. Kris? You know I love having you here. I mean, really, really love it. And everyone likes you. The matriarch likes you even better than me, I think.”

“Yeah?” Kris grins. “She’s just happy you have a mate, I think she wants grandch--” Kris stops, embarrassed. “I, uh, didn’t mean--”

He looks up. Adam’s eyes are glowing.

“Mate.” Adam kisses him tenderly. “Here’s the thing, though. It’s getting a little trafficky here. Don’t misunderstand, I love it when Alli drops by, and it was so great meeting your mom, that pound cake was amazing. But then there’s your publicist, and your assistant, and that guy from the record label, not to mention all the journalists. Sooner or later they’re going to find the nest, and even if they don’t? It’s kind of freaking out the troop, you know?”

“It’ll blow over,” Kris tries. They’ll get a new Idol, and no one will be interested in me anymore.”

“Right. Nobody will be interested in the adorable musician who left his successful career so he could live among bonobos and make love in the jungle.”

“Something more interesting will come along.”

“Kris. Baby. Mate. Nothing more interesting could possibly come along.”

When Kris finally speaks, his voice is very small. “You want me to go back to civilization.”

“Actually, I was thinking maybe we should both go back to civilization.”

A little sniffle. “Both?”

“I’m just about finished with my research here, and I can write anywhere, so. And I’ve been asked to do a lecture series at the Institute. What do you think?”

“I...don’t know. I can’t really imagine you in LA. With a job, and a house--”

“Hey, I have a job here, you know.” Adam pokes Kris.

“--and clothes.”

“Well, not always clothes. Just to leave the house.”

Kris considers. “That might be all right. You mean, like, one of those tweed blazers with elbow patches for the lecturing?”

“Uh huh. Only leather. And no elbow patches.”

“That would work, too.” Kris sighs. “I do miss my guitar. And I’ve had this craving for Indian food.”

“I’ll take you out, first thing. I know a place.”

“Can we still come here, sometimes?”

“Of course we will. This is our honeymoon place.”

Kris makes little swirlies in Adam’s chest hair. “There _are_ going to be Tarzan jokes, though. Just saying.”

“I’m starting to think you’re hoping for Tarzan jokes.”

“C’mon, admit that you can see it.”

“You sure you wouldn’t be Cheeta?”

“Adam.”

“All right, yes, I guess I can kind of see it a little bit.”

“Thank you.”

A helicopter buzzes overhead. Adam pulls the rope that drops the leaf canopy over the nest.

“I’m sure that has nothing whatsoever to do with me,” Kris begins, but Adam stops him with a kiss.

“LA will be good. You’ll get used to me as a city boy. We can build a tree house in the yard. It’ll be just like this, only with pizza.”

They swing for a while, the noise of the helicopter fading into the distance.

“OK, maybe one more week,” Adam says, just to hear Kris squeak with joy.


End file.
